London Calling (let it go to voicemail)!

(Note: The following was published November 4th but actually details the events of November 2nd and 3rd...I'm sorry to have lied to you, but I thought you should hear it from me...)

Flight was fine...wish I had something exciting to say about it, but I don’t.

Watched two movies, Pacific Rim and Captain America: The Winter Soldier, but I only enjoyed one...canyaguesswhich?

Only slept in two two-hour bursts.

Arrived in London and had to answer questions from customs. I didn’t know they’d want to see an e-mail copy of return itinerary. That meant I had to turn on my phone, choose the wrong wifi provider, choose the right wifi provider, sign up with the wifi provider, etc. The fellow behind me in the Marilyn-Monroe-in-skanky-49ers-clothes was visibly impatient. I alerted the cutsoms official to  his annoyance. “Well, he can be annoyed,” she replied, frankly.

She was right, of course. He can!

Then Des picked me up and we rode the “tube” to her place. There was a man who reeked of cat urine, and another man who had the most British voice imaginable: “There was a rather amusing e-mail circulating about the office…”

We got to the flat and I tried my darndest not to fall asleep to cheap British cop shows or lame American sit-coms. One US sit-com was advertised as “the hit American series”...of course, I’ve never heard of it.

Turns out I did fall asleep for a few minutes.

We then walked Bailey around the neighborhood. Cobblestone paths, mandolin players under muraled overpasses, rain. You know, London!

Had some frozen pizza for dinner and some “biscuits” (cookies) which were “smashing” (good) and went by the name “Digestives” (terrible marketing).

But seriously, there is a serious need for marketing professionals here. A breakfast cereal here is named “Multigrain Hoops.” Apparently, british corporations allow the R&D guys to name the products.

After that, at around 10pm local time, I fell asleep.

I awoke again to middle-of-the-night darkness. I checked my phone to see what time it was: 11pm. “You’ve got to be kidding me!” I said out loud, like someone in a movie with lazy writing.

I decided to double check my phone’s report...good thing...it was in fact 3am. My phone must have never switched the time zone since somewhere in the US.

I was so glad that my body didn’t thrust me from the sweet embrace of sleep after only one hour that it took me a good while to realize that four hours of sleep is only marginally better. 3am is not a good time to be awake.

But I couldn't sleep. So I spent a couple hours checking up on how best to contact folks back home (since Skype doesn't work on my computer). After two hours, I realized that Skype works on my phone. I am a model of efficiency!

Eventually, I forced myself to sleep.

End of Part 1. Please eject your cassette and turn it over to side B.